I remember:

I remember:

  1. The Universe does a much better job than I do with picking people
    • I have spent a great deal of time on apps in an effort to connect and meet new people. In doing so, I have met great ones, yet have not met “my person”.  There have been plenty of first dates that produced some of the funniest stories of my life.  My brothers continue to remind me that I will meet the best people while I am doing things I enjoy.  This extended time off proved that to be true.  It turns out the Universe does a much better job with putting higher quality people in my path when I do the things I love.   I did not meet “My person”, however, I did meet some incredible folks without so much work.
  2. Dancing frees my soul
    • It has been a LONG time since I have been out dancing.  Doing so in Moab is different for me.  We dress however we want, ride our bikes, and tear up the dance floor like no one is watching.  I was able to keep in mind that people really don’t care what you are doing during our nights of dancing.  It was the most fun I have had in months.  I danced so much that I sweat like I was in a hot yoga class.  The smile on my face was an outward expression of the joy in my soul!
  3. Rollerskating outside in Moab is fun with a breathtaking view of the sunset
    • As a young girl, I roller skated as often as possible.  I skated in the basement, on freshly paved streets and the roller rink.  To this day, whenever I see a newly paved street, I want to skate on it.  In Moab, monthly they have an outdoor rink event.  This is the perfect blend of all my youthful skating; outside, slick concrete and in a rink.  My inner child is in bliss as we spin around wearing classic skates!
  4. Submerge yourself into rushing water with the intent to LET IT GO, and wait for the incredible release!
    • Every time I come to visit Erin in Moab, she shares a new area with me.  This visit was all about waterfalls and submerging yourself in them with a specific purpose.  I focused on letting go of what no longer serves me and creating space for what is in my highest good to flow to me.  Every moment in the water brought me to the present.  When I focus on the present moment, the past and the future not only don’t matter, they don’t exist.  I struggle to stay in that mental place, but when I do, it is spectacularly freeing!
  5. Hiking barefoot connects me to earth in a sensational way
    • The majority of the hikes during this visit were completed barefoot for a variety of reason. Walking in water, on the sand, and over large rocks pretty much demand you to remove your shoes.  Walking barefoot encourages me to slow down, take mindful steps and breathe.  It was exactly what I needed to experience repeatedly during this break!
  6. Biking all around town is even more fun with a friend
    • The fabulous bike from Sioux Falls with streamers and saddle bags was thoroughly enjoyed in Moab as well.  Riding all over this town with Erin proved to be even more fun! Late night rides under the stars added a new element to the joy of biking I had not expected.
  7. I love living with a kind, generous, considerate, loving, funny and adventurous spirit!  Thank you, Erin, for creating a Moab home for Journey and me!
    • I head to my next assignment with the intent to connect with the optimal family for Journey and me to thrive.  I trust the Universe completely to put exactly who I need to connect with in my path.

Here’s to Letting all that does not serve me,

Kristin

Oasis in the desert

I am back in Moab after spending 5 months in Sioux Falls, SD.  It feels simply spectacular to be back here.  This place is where peace washes over me with a force that can’t be ignored.  My beloved friend, Erin, has created a place for me to call my desert home.  The experience of being here allows the lingering worries to be washed away.  This trip provided the opportunity to literally do just that.

Erin takes me on incredible hikes that seem to always end in a delightful oasis that only the locals know.  This means that we rarely see people and have opportunities to swim and sunbathe without interruption.  We went on two hikes along the Mill Creek trail, each ending at a pool of waterfalls.  The water was freezing!  Actually, it made the “ceremony” more invigorating.   Submerging yourself in cold water has a way of making you let go of all that does not serve you.  You are completely present in what you are doing at that moment.  There is no room for the mental garbage that may have made it along the hike with you.

I set an intention just before stepping into the cold waters, “I release all that does not serve me.  I set free all of the emotional demons that continue to suffocate my joy.  I honor and let go of the old wounds, for they no longer need to set the pace of my present.”  Squealing with delight, a touch of fear, and exasperation of the sensation of the cold, I stepped into the water.  Erin guided me through the navigation of this particular spot in an effort to prevent injury on the slippery rocks.  Having a loving guide makes releasing something easier.  Placing my hands on the side walls of this water channel, I took a deep breath as I thought of my intention, and submerged my entire body into the water.  The rush of water over my head, past my ears, and over my body felt amazing in every way imaginable.  Standing back up to catch my breath,  I hollered with relief as my eyes returned to Erin.  She was cheering me on just as I did for her moments before.

We laughed like little girls and enjoyed each moment.  Drying out in the sun provided the opportunity to share how we have grown and fallen more in love with our authentic selves.  Funny, how it takes about 40 years to do so!

The next day we hiked to the other side of the creek to a different waterfall area where the water was somewhat warmer due to the flow path over slick rock.  I could barely tell the difference, but gladly accepted a few degrees more of warmth.  This new oasis invited another submerging experience.  This time my intention was about allowing love to flow into my life.  As I stood in this new place my intention flowed with ease to my heart. “I open my heart to love and invite all that is meant to come into my life to nourish my highest self.”

Again, Erin coached me through this new waterfall with love and kindness.  There was squealing and laughter just as I submerged myself into this cleansing experience.  As I stood up, I faced the sun with my eyes closed and a smile on my face after I caught my breath, gratitude and pure joy filled me completely.  Gratitude has never felt so good!

I have no idea if this feeling is peace, but I really like it!

Truly Loving This Moment,

Kristin

Leaving home

Yesterday I left my Sioux Falls home.  Tears flowed as I pulled away.  Having yearned for the feeling of home for so long, finding it and then I just left it.  What the hell is wrong with me?  Granted the invitation is there for me to come back.  It was also a wonderful snapshot in time and was never meant to be forever.  Is anything meant to be forever?  Except being with ourselves, of course.  I am beginning to think this life path is all about coming home to ourselves and loving ourselves to pieces just as we are.  I am getting there; if that is the purpose.  Honestly, what I want more than anything is a partnership, and I have them in very different ways. Maybe I have been looking at the closed door of a romantic partnership so long that I forgot to turn around to see all of the other open doors and windows.  So far the partnerships seem to magically show up and stay for a mysterious amount of time and then vanish.  Yet these partnerships are not romantic.

May 4th, I pulled up to my Sioux Falls home without any expectation just filled with hope and delight.  Within 15 minutes of meeting Jess and Tom, they decided to keep Journey and me for the summer.  I was selected, chosen, invited and included.  All of the things I have been begging the universe for simply showed up in a completely unexpected way.  Here, I have been looking for this experience in a romantic relationship, which clearly has not shown up and is probably the best thing for me in this phase of life.  I just can’t believe I left.  Sure I can say it was time to move on and that I have another job awaiting me in a place that I chose to spend my winter.  But in this case, it is me that left this incredible place and feeling not someone leaving me.

Jess and Tom gave me a gift that I was to open later, which was a good thing.  The card and necklace touched my heart in a way that immediately made me sob. Being truly seen, witnessed, heard and enjoyed authentically has been a struggle for a great many years.  I have a gift when it comes to not allowing myself to feel that kind of love in my direction, especially for my goofy authentic self.  Somewhere along the path of this life,  I agreed with the false belief that I am not worthy and certainly not good enough to receive love.  As I bust apart that ridiculous lie, love comes rushing in from all angles.  I am so grateful for all of this love, but I have to admit, I lack experience in knowing how to stand still and absorb it.  I get squeamish and have a difficult time making direct eye contact as incredible words are said to me.  I just keep opening my heart with my eyes wide open in order to absorb every morsel of love.  Just bear with me as I am still learning.  There is a part of me that just wants to shake my shoulders while saying, “Get it through your thick head, YOU ARE LOVED and are WORTHY!  Now get busy letting it in!!”

So here I am in another magical place, Circle View Guest Ranch, where I am loved by people and Jack, the Jackass.  I am greeted with hugs from humans and nuzzle kisses from the Donkey.  My heart just sings even louder as I let this love in.  My time off in between assignments is about collecting love from friends in preparation for finding my beloved Arizona family.  They are out there and will magically show up in a completely different and unexpected way.  The only requirement for me is to be me with my heart open.  Sounds easy enough right?  Yikes!

The connection shows up as needed, I suppose.  Just last night I sat out on the patio watching the incredible sunset.  My plan was to stay outside to stargaze.  As the sky began to transition from sunset to stargazing, two other guests came over and asked to join me.  We stayed out late talking and laughing all about growing up in the 70s and 80s.  It felt amazing to laugh and carry on about “The Old Days”  before the internet and struggles that modern children will never have.  Who remembers calling information (#411) and asking school work questions to an actual human?  Google took the place of that. What about the struggle of phone privacy with a landline and a 25-foot long cord to hide in a closet so you could talk with your boyfriend?  I completely forgot about calling a specific number for the time and temperature.  It was an amazing connection that magically ended as they drove off this morning on their adventure.

I am finding home in moments rather than physical places.  Maybe I am finally onto something.  Could it be peace?  The greatest part about this phase in life is I am finally learning that you never really leave home, for the feeling is always within you.

Thank you so much to Jess, Tom, Jack the Jackass, The Kruse family and fellow guests for coming into my life to remind me of home and worthiness of love!

Truly,

Kristin